In the spring of 1996, I decided to move from being an employee of a company to working for myself as a computer consultant. My first interview was for an interesting graphics project. I was nervous because I had not interviewed for a job in over four years and becoming a consultant was a huge change. I have seasonal allergies and unfortunately on the day of the interview the pollen count shot up to over one thousand. Since the only times I planned to be outside were going to and from my car, I decided not to take any medication. The antihistamines I took at that time made my thinking fuzzy and I wanted to make a good impression.

The interview began well. The manager showed me some of the graphics the company was developing and gave me a general idea of the project. It was fascinating work and I wanted the job. Then, as we sat down to talk about my resume, the fire alarm went off. We had to go outside. I hoped it was a false alarm and we would go back inside quickly, but no such luck. Several fire engines arrived and the firemen spent over half an hour going through the building before letting us back in. By the time we got back to the manager’s office, I was a mess. I had the beginning of a pounding headache, my eyes were swollen and tearing, and I could not stop coughing. So much for a good first impression! My answers to the manager’s questions were passable, but not as good as they could have been.

I went home very disappointed; a wonderful opportunity had just slipped away. The next evening I came home to find a message on my answering machine offering me the job. I took it, of course. A few months later I asked the manager why he had hired me. He grinned and said he always tried to look below the surface during interviews.

The 40 people the manager had assembled were a very diverse group. There was a wide range of nationalities, religions and world views, but it was a very strong and cohesive team and the best group I ever worked with as a programmer.

It is so easy to just look at the surface and form an instant impression that influences our later interactions with another person. How often do we base our opinions on something like clothing, body type, or occupation? Everyone has more to them than what we first see. The woman with the horribly mismatched clothing may have spilled coffee on her blouse that morning and borrowed another one. The yoga teacher you meet at a cocktail party may have been a programmer years before. You never know until you get to know them better.

Another tendency is to focus on the surface of our own lives. When we are busy with all of our daily activities, it is easy to allow our emotions and our feelings about ourselves to be determined by what is happening at that moment. When everything is going well, we feel great and when things are not going as well, we feel upset and unhappy with ourselves. It can be hard to remember in those difficult times the parts of us that are positive and valuable.

One of the gifts of yoga and meditation is that they bring us below the surface and take our minds to a different place. In that place, we can drop the outside distractions and focus on something deeper within ourselves. This brings us back to center, letting us see ourselves as something more than just a reflection of that moment.

For several years I went to the Inner Harmony Retreat Center in Utah for yoga workshops. Midweek we would only have a morning class and then go to Zion National Park for the afternoon. There was a choice of a few different hikes and Angel’s Landing was the most challenging. It is only two and a half miles, but the first two miles are steep switchbacks and the last half mile is a rock scramble.

I decided to try Angel’s Landing and started off with a fairly slow group. Midway through the switchbacks they decided to turn back and I continued on by myself, hoping to catch up with the faster group. When I reached the end of the paved trail and started into the rocky area, it was not as bad as I had expected. The trail was about three feet wide and there was a chain to hold onto. I stopped and looked over the ledge to my right and saw the tops of trees far below. Normally I am not afraid of heights, but this time I panicked.

I pressed my back against the rock wall and hung onto the chain for dear life. After the initial moment of panic faded, I tried to convince myself to move on, but the thought of moving brought the intense fear back again.

As I tried to figure out what to do next, a flash of memory brought back another trip I had taken to the Grand Canyon a few years before. On that trip, we had taken a hike that included a mile long boulder field. In the middle of the boulders I stopped to take a picture and the boulder I was standing on rolled out from underneath me. As I fell my arm hit my sunglasses and I broke my nose. The sky, the rocks and the trees in Zion reminded me of those where I had fallen in the Grand Canyon.

Once I identified the source of my fear, I could convince myself to move on. I thought that if I turned back, it would be harder to go on future hikes in the West or where there were rocks. I made it to the top of Angel’s Landing and the view of Zion Canyon was spectacular and well worth the mental and physical effort to reach it.

The next week I planned to take a less challenging hike, but my roommate convinced me to climb Angel’s Landing with her. This time there was no fear.

We all have things that make us apprehensive and uncomfortable. Sometimes these feelings are rational and protective and keep us from harm. We do not play in traffic when we are little, though the reason may be fear of what will happen if our parents find out rather than our fear of the cars and trucks.

If you do yoga long enough, you usually find a pose that brings up a feeling of fear. For some it is inverted poses like handstand or headstand. For others it can be a backbend because you cannot see where you are going. The fear may be the fear of trying something new or it could be that you are not ready for the pose yet. It also could be related to something in your past that has nothing to do with the pose itself. The trick is to determine what type of fear it is.

You should always honor a fear that is protecting you. It has kept you alive thus far. However, if this fear has another cause, it may be worth trying to move beyond it so you can relish the reward of reaching a new height.

Before last December, I had never remodeled my house or anything else. Adding on to HAYC was a new adventure. As with any new undertaking, I approached it with some trepidation. In talking with friends about remodeling their houses, I heard all types of horror stories. There were unexpected architectural problems, contractors who did not show up, projects that were delayed by months, terrible workmanship, and huge problems with cost overruns.

The newsletters for the Winter session went into the mail before construction started and the Winter session sample classes were scheduled to begin a little more than five weeks later. Once the Fall classes had ended and the demolition of almost half of our existing space had begun, everything was out of my hands. Besides being there every day to make decisions about lights, positions of shelves and whatever minor details came up, I could not do anything to help with the actual work.  I had no control over the situation.

It would be nice to say I remained calm and never worried at all, but there were some moments of concern. Walking the permits through the various local governments had taken much more time than I expected. If the construction ran into the same delays, it would be quite a mess. What would happen if we were delayed a week or a month?

Fortunately we had wonderful contractors. They showed up every day, did excellent work, stayed within budget, and finished in time for our inspections before sample classes began. Our build-out could not have gone any better.

It is always difficult to stop worrying and let go of something that could affect our happiness and peace of mind. The worry could stem from something major that could affect us for quite a while, though often it is something relatively minor like a comment from a friend or co-worker, or returning again to memories of a past event. We cannot change the past and there is often little we can do to change the future or the actions of other people. Our thoughts spin around and around as we try to find some way to direct or contain what is beyond our control.

One suggestion for living a happy life that I run across frequently in yoga workshops and in books is to live in the moment. I have always wondered how one can live in the moment and save for retirement. If you are living in the moment, you are not thinking of the future. Of course, if you do not think of the future, it may be difficult to live.

The method that allows me to find peace of mind is to prepare for the future the best that I can and then let go. In the case of our expansion, preparation involved clearing my schedule during the weeks of construction so I could be available if needed. Also, I thought about various ways to shift the 2006 schedule if necessary and how to set up phone trees to notify everyone. Whenever I became concerned, I would go back to my list of preparations, realize there was nothing more I could do, and mentally change the subject.

A friend said that her method is to imagine the absolutely worst situation that could arise from her current concerns. Usually she realizes that even the worst case scenario is really not that bad and she is worrying unnecessarily.

Often when we step back and examine our concerns, we find they are truly minor. Even when they are major, we seldom can do anything about the situation. If we could, we would act instead of worrying helplessly.

When you realize that you are limited in your response to a problem, you can choose to continue to worry, or you can find a method to let go. When you let go, you are free to live in the moment.

We’re expanding! When classes resume in January, there will be a fourth room and the Green Room will be larger. For the men, we are adding a second dressing room. There will be some changes to the schedule as well. The evening prenatal class is moving from Friday at 5:45 p.m. to Thursday at 5:45 p.m. and the Gentle Yoga 2 is moving from Tuesday at noon to Thursday at 10:00 a.m. To accommodate school schedules, the Friday Kids Yoga class will begin at 4:30 p.m. An early morning Yoga 2, an evening Yoga 2-3 and an evening Yoga 3 have been added. There are also two new classes on the schedule, Yin Yang Yoga and Vinyasa Yoga.

Yin Yang Yoga combines a quiet Yin practice where poses are held passively for a relatively long period of time with a more active Yang practice. Vinyasa Yoga is a moving style of yoga where the poses are connected in a continuous flow.

It’s funny, but if you had asked me 12 years ago where I would be right now, I never would have guessed that I would be working with architects and contractors to add another room to my yoga center. I probably would have answered without hesitation that I would be working as a computer programmer somewhere, hopefully on an interesting project.

I had focused since my late teens on becoming a programmer and had never thought about doing anything else. When I burned out and realized I needed to find a new profession, I felt rather lost. At first I had trouble even contemplating anything outside of a computer field. Then one day it dawned on me how many possibilities were available. I could move to a different area of the country, I could go back to school in the evenings, I could do something entirely different with my life; there was a whole world out there I had never considered. It was as if blinders had come away from my eyes and I was completely stunned and unbalanced by this new view of the world and my place in it. I decided to become a computer consultant for a few years so I would have the freedom to explore other interests and still be grounded in the profession I knew. Over the course of several years, I transitioned into yoga.

Many view yoga as twisting into extreme pretzel shapes. Frequently when I tell people I teach yoga, I get the comment that the person would like to do yoga, but cannot due to a lack of flexibility. For some this is a polite way of changing the subject, which is fine, but others are completely serious. They are convinced it is not possible for them, so they refuse to even try, completely missing the point that yoga could increase their flexibility.

The Health Advantage Yoga Center now has two classes a week at Sunrise Assisted Living in Reston. I suspect that the majority of the people in these classes never expected to do yoga, especially not at this time in their lives. It has been fun to hear about the new things the groups have achieved. One class is now able to do yoga poses sitting in a chair, move to the floor and do poses there, then return to sitting and standing without outside assistance. Getting up and down from the floor is quite an accomplishment and one that many never thought would be possible when they began the classes.

Our views of what we are and what we are capable of can limit us. We tend to see ourselves, our bodies and our lives in set terms and often do not consider what actually might be possible. The world continues to evolve and change and there are always new areas to explore. Wouldn’t it be nice if our views of ourselves continued to expand as well?

Several months ago I upgraded my computer. It was four and a half years old, rather ancient in computer years, and I had procrastinated for over a year. In the past, when I upgraded my computer, there were problems. When I switched from my first computer to my second many years ago, a part failed the first time I turned it on and smoke poured out of the back. My upgrade in 2000 required hours and hours on the phone over several days because I could not connect to the Internet.

Computers have come a long way in four years and I was pleasantly surprised when it took less than five minutes to establish an Internet connection. The only hassle was getting Windows, the firewall and the antivirus software to cooperate. Now I have a reasonably safe computer that runs at a satisfactory speed. I should have done this years ago!

Like most people, I tend to avoid things that have caused me problems in the past. In some ways this is smart; I learn from my mistakes. However, in some cases, like my computer, avoiding the discomfort of upgrading held me back. I can now burn backup CDs and I have a new email program and Internet browser that would not have run on my old machine. I am sure there are all types of features I have not discovered yet.

In the yoga classes I teach, it is very obvious there are some poses that people do not like and do not practice at home very often. We tend to enjoy the poses we can do well and those are the ones we practice. Through practice we see improvement and we tend to like those poses even more. Yet, each pose has a purpose. If you do one class of poses like forward bends to the exclusion of other poses like backbends, over time your body becomes unbalanced. Your hamstrings become more flexible while your hip flexors may tighten. To bring your body into balance, you need to practice a range of poses, creating both strength and flexibility.

One practice method is to choose poses you do not like and do those as your yoga practice a few times a month. Another is to choose a pose or two you find challenging and add it to your regular practice. These poses may not become your absolute favorites, but you may find over time they are not your absolute least favorite poses either.

How often have you avoided something you know you need to do, but have held back because you did not want to deal with the discomfort? One student told me her method of handling tasks is to do the least pleasant tasks first, and then the rest are easy. If you do the easy or fun tasks first and postpone the less agreeable tasks, they tend to stay at the back of your mind and the idea of doing them becomes even more unappealing.

It is human nature to be attracted to that which is pleasurable, but when taken to an extreme, there can be pitfalls, such as overeating or over exercising. Our behavior can be equally influenced by that which we attempt to avoid.

When you find you are avoiding something, is it wisdom gained from past experience, or would your life be enhanced by working through the discomfort so you can enjoy what is on the other side?

I was in a sorority in college. It was the newest sorority at the school, only four years old when I joined my freshman year. The year it was founded, the first members rented a house for a weekend about an hour away and spent the weekend creating the bylaws, rules and guidelines by which the sorority would function. The next year they met at the same house to revise them and to discuss plans for the following year. They met at the same place again the year after that. By the time I joined the sorority, the weekend administrative retreat had become a tradition.

My senior year roommate was the sorority vice president and it was her responsibility to organize and run the retreat. The group had grown over the years from less than twenty women to almost one hundred. My roommate did not think that crowding that many college-age women in a house together would result in any meaningful decisions, but she did not want to break tradition, so we went back to the same house yet again.

The weekend resulted in a lot of tired and grumpy women, but accomplished very little else. My roommate suggested that that the officers the following year create a new tradition and do something entirely different.

Very often, when beginning something new, procedures and practices are created out of necessity. They are not meant to become set in stone; they are just created to get everything started. The hope is that processes and procedures will evolve with time. The tendency however, is to get stuck and to do things in a certain way because that is the way they have always been done.

Our minds and bodies tend to get stuck in their own habits. We often travel down the same mental paths, getting stuck in worries about the past or in anticipation of the future even when it is not productive. We tend to have physical habits like sitting with the same leg crossed over the other or crossing our arms with the same arm in front each time. These actions may have begun because they were comfortable or because this is what we saw our parents do. Over time, these actions became habits as we repeated them.

Actually, we have thousands of thoughts a day and our bodies change constantly. Think about how you feel when you roll out of bed in the morning. Your body is likely to be stiff and tight. By the end of the day, your body is very different. You are probably more flexible than you were first thing in the morning and your body reflects your actions of the day. If you have sat or stood for long periods of time or have exercised, you probably feel the effects.

To change an unnecessary or unproductive habit, we first must become aware of it. An odd wrist ache may prompt us to examine how we hold our hands and shoulders when we use our computer. A recurring back ache may encourage us to sit or stand differently. If we find we are constantly worried because our thoughts are mired in a persistent concern, this may be a sign that something in our lives should change.

Some structure is necessary to function. A group does not operate well without rules and procedures, and we cannot relearn how to walk every morning. However, there is something to be said for thinking outside of the box when our normal routine becomes counterproductive. By studying our habits and traditions, we may enjoy the freedom that a breath of fresh air provides.

The only times I watched weather reports when I was little were in the winter when there was the possibility of snow. When snow was mentioned, the anticipation began. If the weatherman predicted a lot of snow, I of course agreed with him, hoping there would be enough to close the schools the next day. If the forecaster just predicted flurries or a scant inch or two, I would decide he was wrong and hope for large quantities of snow anyway. Sometimes I would even get up a few times during the night to check how much, if any, snow had fallen.

When I woke up the next morning, I was either overjoyed that there was enough snow to close the schools, or dejected that there was not much snow at all. The anticipation of snow and the actual snowfall colored my attitude for the first few hours of those days.

As spring approaches, there is a hint of warmth in the air on some days and the bite of winter on others. At lunch recently, one woman said that March is her least favorite month because you get your hopes up for warm weather, then the wind and cold return. Early spring brings continuous expectation and disappointment.

We have expectations about so many things including the people around us. In some cases we have low expectations and we are pleasantly surprised when the person does something seemingly out of character to exceed them. Just as often, our expectations of others are unrealistically high and when they are not met, we are disappointed.

Our expectations extend to our careers as well. I expected to be a computer programmer at a medium to large company and advance within the company, or maybe in my late thirties move into consulting work. Instead, I became a consultant before I was thirty and now I own a yoga center. Though it has turned out for the best, there were a few years of inner turmoil when my expectations did not coincide with reality.

For better or worse, reality often does not exactly fit our expectations. Years ago, an engineering friend showed me the equation:

Satisfaction = f (Reality – Expectations)

My friend was talking about marketing computer systems and how the client’s satisfaction was directly related to his expectations.  If the client’s expectations were not met by the new computer system, he would not be satisfied.

In the case of computer systems, a client can demand changes, but we usually do not have the same control over everything that happens around us. We cannot change the weather or people’s personalities much less direct all the outside factors that shape our lives. Reality is as it is, no matter what our expectations are. In the end, our choice lies in whether or not we let our expectations control our enjoyment of life.  When the trees begin to sprout a haze of green and the flowers start to grow, we can either enjoy or despise the cool reminder of winter on the cold and windy days. The weather will not change, though our attitude towards it can.

When reality and your expectations do not mesh, how do you react? Are you pleasantly surprised or are you disappointed? Can you allow reality to just be and enjoy it for what it is? Many times, it is precisely the unexpected that takes our lives in new and sometimes exciting directions.

We have all had the experience of attending a new school, whether it is the first day of kindergarten or switching to a new high school mid year. As the first day approaches, there is the thrill of anticipation mixed with the disquiet of facing the unknown. Excited thoughts of new adventures are mingled with concerns of fitting in and finding friends.

As we move beyond school, there are major events like new jobs, marriage and having children, each of which is accompanied by that same mix of excitement and apprehension. A similar rush of adrenaline and ache in the pit of the stomach can be felt before smaller moments like leading a meeting for the first time or throwing a first party. There is always a chance something unexpected could happen.

Once we have done something many times, the excitement and unease fade. It becomes just another meeting or party, nothing to get too excited about. What was a huge nerve-wracking event becomes commonplace. Sometimes we feel that we are doing the same thing over and over again, year in and year out. We drive the same routes, work with the same people and see the same neighbors. We may feel we are in a deep rut.

The yoga center has a predictable flow: the brochures for the next session are mailed, registration starts, the current session ends, there is a short break and then the new session begins. Yet each session brings new students and many returning students change classes, levels and instructors. There are new combinations of students in classes and different levels of enrollment. Even though the outer rhythm stays the same, there are constant variations within it.

I have taught beginning yoga classes for years, and at one point I taught five beginning yoga classes per session. I find it fascinating that no class is ever the same. The students have different amounts of energy and interests, different injuries, and different questions. An explanation of a pose that works well in one class is met with blank stares in the next. These variations have kept the classes new and interesting year after year.

The unknown can be as thrilling and scary as the first day of school, but often, it is unrecognized. When a party becomes just another party, we forget there is always the chance someone could spill red wine on the carpet.

When you stop and consider, there is always some uncertainty in everything in life. You never really know what will happen when you step out of your door each morning, much less what you will find when you enter your office or what your children will tell you when they arrive home from school. Even when you talk with a spouse or an old friend, you are never exactly certain what they are thinking or feeling at that time. From previous experience, there are expectations, but you can never completely predict what will happen.

Now we are beginning a new year. It is a time of new resolutions and new beginnings, a recognized and celebrated step into the unknown. New resolutions create a sense of excitement, accomplishment or worry at first, but after a while these emotions tend to fade as a routine becomes established.

We would have trouble functioning if we lived each day as if it were the first day of school. Constant excitement and nervousness would wear us down. However, life without the unknown would be incredibly dull. The trick is to see the infinite variations within our regular schedules and to realize that the unknown is always there. With the unknown there is always something new.

During my sophomore year of college, all students received membership cards in their mailboxes for the Student Apathy Club. The note that came with the card instructed us to return it within two weeks or we would automatically become a member of the club. I have to admit I thought it was a clever idea and kept the card instead of returning it. A few weeks later the student who had originally sent the cards wrote an article in the campus newspaper declaring the Student Apathy Club the largest organization at the school. Evidently, very few students had bothered to return their cards. I am sure some people kept the cards for their novelty as I did, but most threw them away or ignored them. For the rest of the school year there were occasional notices in the student newspaper congratulating the Student Apathy Club whenever a campus event had an especially low turnout.

Though the Student Apathy Club was humorous, it illustrated the indifference many students felt towards campus events. I was reminded of this indifference after the presidential election in November 2000 when less than 65% of the eligible population voted. One poll reported that one in five of those who did not vote said they did not have the time. When one considers all the countries in the world where free elections do not exist and how hard many Americans such as the suffragettes and those who fought the Jim Crow laws worked to make voting possible for all, this is rather amazing. In light of what a privilege voting is, it is surprising that such a large percentage chooses not to vote.

Though politics can seem far removed from our daily lives, there are often things we know we should do for ourselves and for our families that we let slide. We hear and read almost daily about the benefits of a good diet and regular exercise but, as most of us know, this is hard to follow on a consistent basis. After the winter holidays, the gyms become overcrowded with new members who made resolutions to exercise regularly during the new year. After a month or two, the gyms settle back to their normal pace as peoples’ resolutions fade. I see the same trend in the winter session at HAYC as I talk with new students and students returning after a break of a few months.

Every day is a new day. The sun rose and set long before humans had calendars and though some believe that certain dates are more auspicious than others, the first of January is not the only date to begin anew. It is just a convenient marker. You can choose tomorrow to begin a change in your life; the trick is maintaining your dedication after the excitement of the initial few weeks.

There are thousands of books and videos about weight loss, exercise and making life changes. Different techniques appeal to different people, but a large part of creating a change is setting an intention and then having the discipline to follow through. Discipline can be seen as a harsh, strict word, but it also can be seen as a positive motivating force.

We have signs on the walls of our yoga rooms that say ‘Discipline is Remembering What You Want.’ By this definition, discipline can be the result of keeping our intention in mind when we begin to stray from our chosen path.

So, what is important to you? The first step is setting an intention. It may be to take an hour to vote so that your voice is heard, buying a few more vegetables on your next trip to the grocery store, climbing the steps when you normally would take the elevator, or setting time aside for a home yoga practice. It is all just remembering what you want.

I am in awe of columnists. Each week, and in some cases, several times a week, they write new material for the world to read. Art Buchwald has written columns since 1949, and his columns now appear in the Style section of The Washington Post twice a week. Bob Levey just retired from The Post after writing a column five days a week for over 20 years. A new idea for each column, year after year. I spend the months before each of my quarterly articles waiting for inspiration to strike, and I am not sure I would find such inspiration weekly, much less daily. I suspect columnists look at the world in a slightly different way, seeing and being able to express what is notable or humorous in the world around them.

This newsletter is quite a change from our previous ones: a new design, new colors, and even a new registration form. Our website has changed as well. Our aim is better organization and readability. In rethinking the newsletter and the website, it was interesting to see how the graphic designers, Laura Symanski and Liz Carroll, approached the project. Both have years of experience and were able to offer excellent redesign suggestions. As the office staff and I reviewed the various drafts, we each focused on the areas that we thought could be improved and made clearer, redoing the registration form and rewording some policies where there have been questions. Each of us looked at the new brochure and website from our areas of experience.

In teaching a yoga class, I find some concepts are easy for students to grasp and some are much more challenging. In the upper levels we focus on fine details of poses, from how each part of the foot extends down into the earth to how to tone and stretch various muscles. In almost every class some students grasp the main concept immediately while others need to do a few poses before the idea sinks into their bodies. Interestingly, it is not always the same students who grasp the concept week after week, usually different concepts appeal to different people.

I find the same is true when I travel to weekend workshops with friends. Since the workshops are typically 10 or 12 hours long and quite a lot of information is presented, we compare notes at the end. Often we find that each of us learned something different from the workshop. The differences may be as small as minor details, but frequently we remember entirely different things. Usually we remember what applies to us. One person may remember various philosophical points relative to their life experiences, another how the sequence of poses made attempting a difficult pose easier, and another may have learned a detail that made all the poses easier. Sometimes it seems as if we attended completely different workshops.

If you do yoga long enough, you find some aspect, mental or physical, that is challenging. For someone with tight hamstrings, forward bends can be difficult. Some would see forward bends as poses to be avoided and would not do them except in a class. Others would view them as a challenge and do a few forward bends every day to create more flexibility.

Once we have done a pose a few times, our view of the pose precedes us actually doing it and we enter the pose with our experience partially predetermined. If our previous experience was good or bad, we expect it will be that way again. We tend to bring our expectations, likes, and dislikes to the pose. However, the yoga pose is as it is. There is nothing inherently positive or negative about it.

When we view our world, our past experiences act as a filter. Whether it is seeing an idea for a column in everyday life, bringing an opinion to a project or performing a yoga pose, each of us has our own way of looking at it. In the end, just like a yoga pose the world is as it is. Our filters color our experience.

By studying ourselves and knowing our patterns of thought, we can discover which filters are helpful and which limit us. As we discover filters that are not useful to us, we can replace them with new ways of thought and healthier patterns. Over time, we may begin to view a pose as just a pose, the world as it is, and ourselves as we truly are.